A blast from the past...anal confession

Many years ago....in a land far, far away...

I was about to have the most rockin one night stand with this guy I was conversing with online for a few weeks. We met up at a club. We had some drinks and danced and he was hot and I was hot for him. The night came to an end and we headed to his small studio apartment. As we arrived, I could feel I needed to use the toilet, but I refused to do something like THAT at his place. We started playing around and  as the passion grew with great force, the feeling of having to go subsided.

Full throttle from the very beginning...sucking, licking, exploring, and fucking with pictures and video. Nothing was not done...including the finale of ANAL! Hot with desire and passion, I had forgotten I needed to go. In the slow and hot build up of entry, I was ready! Once in the right gear, he slowly upshifted until he was in 6th ...when the oil gasket blew! With every thrust, my passion spewed...literally. He was unwavering in his excitement and continued on until he reached his destination. Upon finishing, he was calm and relaxed and quite sympathetic. Shit happens right! Meanwhile, I was mortified, but refused to show it. We cleaned up and changed the sheets like it was nothing. We then laid down in each others arms and enjoyed the pictures we took and reminisced on all our fun. We were both high from the excitement of the great sex we had just experienced, but in the back of my mind, I could not wait for him to go to sleep, so I may use his toilet in peace. Well, somewhat peace...I knew there was going to be WWIII going on just steps away from his bed. He finally drifts away to dreamland and I get up quietly to take my moment. I sit on the toilet and let the demons out. Slowly not to create tremors. I waited to release between his snores. I could not believe the satisfaction of that very movement once it was over. I go to flush the toilet and get into the shower, when the next level of my nightmare begins...the toilet begins to over flow. Oh GOD please no...nooooooooooo! I take the lid off the back and try to get the lever back on to prevent more overspill...then look for the plunger and it is nowhere to be found. I can handle this, but please God let me do this without waking him up!

I finally get the toilet to stop flowing and he is still snoring along. I put the lid down and sit on the toilet and think about how to handle this situation without a plunger. After pondering my options for 20 minutes, I clean up all that I can and come to the conclusion: I must face the music. I have to wake him up and have him help me clean up my shit. Or could I just leave and never speak to him again? That was an option, but then what if I saw him out? He would remember me as the girl who killed his toilet and left. Nope, not an option. Face the music it was to be. I woke him up and asked for help...

Needless to say, after that dreadful yet fun and adventurous night, we became a couple and were together for over 2 years!

Sometimes, the root of your desire goes well beyond your trunk

In the last year and a half I have studied the sexual nature of myself and men from all over the world. I have exposed and experienced idiocy, extreme perversions, tenderness, longing, success and downfalls. The most interesting thing I have come across is the hidden desire for something real through the force of online anonymity. I have trolled sex ads, placed sex ads, sold my sex, my body and essence and shared all for the world to see and experience through word or in the flesh. What I discovered through all the myriad facades is:

The majority of men have perverse ideas in their heads. Ideas spoon fed from pornography: how many places can I stick my cock, how can I tear that up, the submission of a woman tending to his piece, him performing an act that appears to be turning her on or getting her off or even going to an extreme of turning something completely disgusting into a complete raw form of enjoyment. In other words, the ecstasy of completely letting go to every and all inhibitions.

Men also have a romanticized drive of what sex should be for them. They have a desire for physical contact, touching, being touched, being pleased equally to pleasing. The disconnection or connection they have falters in the communication and expression of desire and imagination of desire.

Online anonymity provides a platform to express ones self in this pornographic alter ego and play in the realm of fantasy. But really this alter ego is merely a manifestation of something, I think even most men do not realize and that is this romanticized desire that links them closer to a woman. I know you probably think I am full of shit, but working as a whore and meeting many, many, many men in the "anonymous" realm of fantasy, the outcome or reality supports my argument.

85% of the men that seek me out and book me are married or in a relationship
10% of the men are successful and attractive men, who just have no time for seeking or sustaining a relationship
5% are just insecure or really the stereotypical guys who could not get a woman if they tried

The factor they all have in common: they all seek companionship, closeness and to fulfill desire for something they do not have.

The men who are married seek most of all: tenderness, attention, the feeling of being desired and of course excitement! Obviously the things that are lacking in their everyday relationships. Sure, they may approach me with some crazy pornographic idea of what they would like to do, but ultimately, they wanted to be ABLE to express this type of desire without judgment or immediate denial. Once meeting in the flesh, their comfortability and feeling of freedom, because of the openness, their true desire and essence is exposed.  Many of course do not do the things they say they think they want to do, rather they take their time and enjoy the open company and fall prey to the moment and the natural forces of two souls coming together.

The single, successful and attractive men with no time, know exactly what they want and waste no time expressing it and doing it. They are not bogged down by the emotion of dissatisfaction of a relationship. They do not pretend for a moment and take advantage of this fantasy world alongside the give and take. They value their time and investment and make the most of it. Their fantasy and realistic desire to be touched and to touch, to give and receive collide and usually with a sonic boom.

The 5% of insecure or stereotypical men are really broken into two groups. Wanting the connection and the "know how" and those that are completely perverse and have no desire for anything other than their pornographic manifestations.

The insecure use the anonymity as a shield to protect them from embarrassment. Many express themselves opposite to who they really are to help build themselves up or keep it as real as possible and with only a few embellishments for fear of "me" meeting them in the flesh and feeling incompetent. These men really seek the chance to make a woman feel like a goddess, since in their real lives, they have no one. They want to know what it is like to be touched and to touch and make a woman happy and usually have little regard for self gratification.

On the other side of the spectrum...is the extreme perverse. They have no ability to communicate or express themselves outside this pornographic fantasy land. The anonymity allows them to be "the supernatural porn star" they could never be in real life. Of course, some whores will cater to this persona for an easy buck and it is a shame to see this behavior perpetuated. Especially when there are very good techniques some of us have to reveal and play on these desires in other ways.  For these men, the goal is to remove any and all emotion from the equation and test the limits of physical gratification and pay no attention to why they would want to do the things they do.

The Ignorance of Men Desperate for Sex

Creating silly Craigslist ads is a fun way to pass time and seems to be a popular form of entertainment... not just for myself, but for many others. Yesterday after reading through some of the personal ads in the Berlin chapter, I was inspired! I decided once again to see how far some men would go for sex.

Hottie with a Surprise!

“I am a very attractive blond woman. I live alone and need some sex. I have herpes but do not like to use condoms. Are there any good looking men out there...well that don't mind?”

This is very scary guys and gals! Here are only the first few responses. Sadly no pics were made available to match a face/cock to the ignorance.

From P.

I guess that is not infectious, hmm? I am interested and hope that you
are real. I am German, tall, well educated, clean and just need some
distraction. So if you are still up for it, please let me know. Best ..

Dear Mr. P…..you are obviously NOT a well-educated man and in your statement identifying yourself as German is shameful to all Germans. Not only is Herpes contagious…there is no cure. If it goes undiagnosed you could get early onset dementia and when you have your outbreaks nice juicy sore red pustules take over your entire penis! Which would you prefer?

From Jeff K

I must say thats the first I see an ad such as this, I like the honesty! you seam like a boiling steamer ! 

Dear Jeff K,

I have many steaming boils, that was the point. Would you like them on your mouth or all over your cock? Honesty is only half the battle.

From Megane Trish

hi,

i'm interested & i don't mind your herpes ;-) 

 

Dear Megane,

 

You really should care about my herpes…even if you already have them…who knows what else I may have?

 

From Michael  Mclaughlin

That is a sick post and you are not real. 

Dear Michael,

I think you may be the only man here able to maintain blood flow to both heads at once!! J

 

From Braziliian Guy Cara Legal

Hey there, im a good looking brazilian guy in berlin now. I would like to meet you.. Where are you?   Dear Braziliian Guy,   No offence, but in the sexually educated reality, Brazil is number one in the modern world for HIV. Why? Because of your twisted idea about anal penetration not being considered sex! Having anal intercourse with young ladies to “preserve her virginity” and since you do not consider anal as sex, there is of course no need for a condom! Having herpes is bad enough, I do not want a dose of HIV or whatever else may be clinging on to your balls.

 

From Martin Martino

hi there,

 

just saw your post.

if you real lets really make it happen.

 

I am a handsome, typical artist in Berlin, not desperate for sex but really fancy a spontaneous meeting with sazzy stranger

I am 33, skim, dark chocolate skin, black curls and all that jazz.

 

dont ask for naked photo that ot gonna happen

if you up for it we can meet in a ice cozy bar and see how it goes

I have standard too ;-)

so,...

Dear Martin,

So would it be safe to say that “typical artists” go slathering their cocks in any canvas? Why would I want a naked pic to begin with? One, I am not a man and two if I am a herpes infected nasty bitch who wants to fuck you without a condom, why would I give a sit about what you look like? Please clarify your standards….that is what I thought, any woman that would not walk out of the bar after meeting you J


From Benny

By the way it is not really a surprise if you tell before they unpack the present. The best answer might be: I do mind, because you'll endanger everyone who is careless enough.

Then again I guess your revealing post suggests that in fact a lot of people don't give a liquid fart about their health or the health of others. Quiet sad, quiet stupid, quiet egoistic.

Without writing about that Herpes you'd even have ten times more replies of people who are willing to have condomless sex with a total stranger. You should strike there next time.

Nicely done, strangress/stranger.
You're my hero/in of the day.

Later From Michael Mclaughlin

Ok, this is Michael, one of your posters. You know, the guy with blood flowing to both ends. I might add I turned the post into CL for removal I found it so offensive. So was there any, uh, prize or reward for doing the right thing? Shouldn't right moral courage be rewarded? I am not talking about you owe me a casual encounter, but how about an ice cream? A cup of coffee? Order of fries?

Just asking.  Michael  Since I am a curious sort why did you run the ad? I wonder if women would respond in the same way? I sure hope not. No, women are not that bloody stupid.

 

Hello Michael,

I remember who you are. I want to congratulate for a great job in policing Craigslist for inappropriate behavior. Why did I do it? Consider it a wake up call or a public service announcement.

I do this on occasion to show 1. women how far men will go 2. to show how ridiculous the responses are 3. to prove a point about ignorance....but this one in particular, to show how easy it could be to catch a disease. Many of these men on CL are married or have girlfriends...and I know for a fact that many of them cruise the site with much luck, only to (if I were real, in this case) to have risked their (significant others) health and lives for one moment of bliss.  

It is meant to be offensive! Because it is! Sometimes in the anonymous world where anything goes, some blip of reality must surface from time to time. So no, no prize...I do not ever reward bad behavior.

As far as women responses....the only female responses were....thank you and this is disgusting! Do not even begin to think that women behave and react to sex in the same way as men do....when they do, it is only an act or because that is the only way they were taught to attract a man in the first place. There is no doubt that women have desires and kinky desires at that.But the way we desire and who we desire is not lost in blood flow between our nether regions and our brains.

 

From Ashley (A woman I am guessing)

 

OMG! This is sad and funny at the same time! You are brilliant !

We are all whores! II

We are all whores!

 

If this offends you, then perhaps this is not the blog for you. This is the true story of a woman who embraced her sexuality and discovered personal success in peddling her own natural resources as a whore.

 

There is a reason this is the oldest profession. But I declare it is one of the world’s most honest professions, yet yields a harsh reputation. It is clearly in demand, for that is why it exists. One could say a woman cheapens herself when she takes remunerations for her services, but this is surely not the case, when so many give it away for free.

 

If you think whores are limited to women who walk the street and tempt you with their seemingly enchanting goods, you are wrong. Think about it, every day you wake up at some God awful hour to go to work, usually doing something that takes from you more than it gives in return. Every day you compromise your principles, you sacrifice your health, your family, your time…and for what, for who? For some boss or several bosses that will always get paid more to do less. But make no mistake, they too are whores. They too must pay the piper in some way, but usually it is at your expense. Their dilemma lies in their conscience and it is not for us to see.

 

Think about life in only black and white and in the view of consumers and producers. You are programmed to think you are the consumer, but you really are only a producer, that consumes. The more you desire, the more you need, the more you must produce. Yet, you are not rewarded in time or money the more you produce, so why do you produce more? When you delve into your work until 10 at night and have left what is important alone, do you even take the time to revel in the consumables you have? Do you think about all the memories you have sacrificed? Have you realized your resource and potential and compared it to your sacrifices?

 

The boss on the other hand, has no need to think about these things, because having you as his slave, he has time to enjoy his consumables and make memories. But he as the ultimate consumer, who also produces, must continue his standard of living for fear of one day becoming you.

 

Some whores sacrifice all the things that are important in life as a slave, because either they are willing to sacrifice their children, their wives, or their health to survive or in hopes to ultimately become the boss. While some whores are willing to sacrifice those things on your behalf as a rule of survival of the fittest. This whore is the biggest whore of all. The big whore knows the worth and value of the slave and buys him at the cheapest rate, just enough to keep that carrot on the stick alluring. The cheap whore goes along with this rate, because he himself never knew his worth, nor did he demand it.

 

So when you drive off to work, leaving your beautiful wife and your children at that God awful hour in your fancy car, your clunker, or even the train, take a good look around you and you will see how small you are in the sea of cheap whores. Perhaps you will have the strength to say, WTF?

 

The only difference with the whore who works as such openly and you is that she has come to terms with her enslavement. She has found something of herself that has value, that is marketable and manageable and on her own terms. She has not only separated herself from the sea of cheap whores in denial, but she has weighed the worth and value and demands it up front. The business transaction is made without further debt. The client gets what he pays for and she can live in reasonable comfort, luxury, have time to build memories, raise her children, and even have her health. If she plays it smart, she can even build something for her offspring. Sounds a little like marriage, don’t you think, but with no strings attached.  In the case of the whore, her title is clearly placed on her door.

 

The truth is, the sooner we acknowledge that we are all whores, the sooner we can find our personal worth and demand it.